+500 rivalry

[shitloaf]

hello all! my name is amanda and i'm bringing in one grumpy little shit here, carver hawke. he's from the dragon age series and coming from that nebulous timeframe of post the main game of inquisition and is on the warden path. his world state is pretty horrible because why not—it's here if you want to take a gander—so he'll be surprised to see some people here! if anything needs to be skirted around icly, please let me know!

basically, he's kind of a jerk, doesn't know when not to say things, has a slight bit of chill since becoming a warden, and is the last one left of his family. apologies in advance for all the stupid crap he's probably going to say.

looking forward to playing with you all! feel free to catch me on plurk @ honnleath (just lmk who you are if it's not obvious ty!) or send a pm if that's more your bag for any plotty biz!

Comments

[scowls]

Fenris will be pleased that Carver is still alive.

[shitloaf]

so will carver. himself and fenris! at least they have stuff to commiserate about.

[scowls]

pls to be teaching him to read. not that that would be a relaxing exercise since short tempers everywhere but....

[shitloaf]

he will. and probably only get mad like once about it. he has a little bit of a nice streak!

somewhere....

[circlejerked]

HELLO AGAIN, FANCY MEETING YOU HERE.

[shitloaf]

HAHAHA HI THERE. carver is officially here to rain on everyone's parade :D

[circlejerked]

That means the blood sacrifice to the app gods must have worked I MEAN what no.

I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to the cast growing and getting to play with you guys for real now. There's a spot on Anders' last nerve with Carver's name on it, enjoying jumping up and down on it, LMAO.

[shitloaf]

see? this is why mages are terrible. #trustnomage!!!!!!!

I am really looking forward to this too! it's such a nice sized cast here. and carver fully intends to shred that last little spot. unless anders gets to his first. which I imagine awakenings anders would... like who even r u, buddy??? this is not the maniac I know!!!!

[circlejerked]

Shhh, it's okay, shhhh, what happens in super secret Warden club stays in super secret Warden club.

This is the horrible truth--even without being possessed by the homicidal spirit with the one track mind, Anders is somehow EVEN MORE IRRITATING. Have fun, Carver. :'D I'm excited for Carver to read him the riot act and side eye, sorry not sorry.

[shitloaf]

that doesn't sound like a fun club.

HE WILL HAVE NO FUN. at least until he discovers he can literally wish a mabari into existence or whatever. then he will have a little fun. UNTIL THEN. none. none for anyone X(

[circlejerked]

TBH, it isn't and Anders could have told you that. What kind of idiot suggested Carver join the--OOPS, OH WAIT. He'll be mildly disturbed to hear he's recruiting in the future. D:

Look, Carver, there's plenty of other fun to be had!! Come join Anders in wishing for all sorts of weird and exotic foods to try so it's like a never-ending buffet.

[shitloaf]

yeah that'll be fun. btw this is all ur fault. thx tho, not dead. sort of. slight plus.

he won't want to, but i can just see it happening. sitting by the closet and stuffed with food and snapping at each other. these are the things memories are made of.

[circlejerked]

In that case, he's happy to save your life. #humblebrag

I smell a possible joint post in the future... With any new Earth food that comes their way there's a, "Carver, try this!" The bright side is, they have all the time in the world to burn the calories off.

[shitloaf]

and then anders gets a plate of something weird shoved in his face and it turns into a scuffle. #lifewithcarver

[circlejerked]

Gosh, Carver's career track is being the little brother people never knew they wanted or needed. ANDERS IS UNSURE HOW TO FEEL ABOUT THIS.

[shitloaf]

that's basically his life. no one wanted him and he knows it, but he's here anyway and won't someone please care???????

[circlejerked]

Anders wouldn't mind having family... but the nice kind of family, not the kind that shouts "ABOMINATION" from across the Thanksgiving dinner table. X|

[bloodmagics]

I'm so happy you don't even know oh my god

ANYWAY, hello! I'm Raos, the resident Garrett Hawke, as well as Regina Mills from Once Upon a Time.

Hawke is from way back at the end of the Deep Roads expedition (as in, he didn't actually get to leave the Deep Roads) and has no idea if Carver survived the Joining or not so uh. This is going to be an absolute train wreck because why are you older than him Carver why? Also the whole thing about him not being Marian, though he is aware that Marian exists, thanks to Dorian and the Inquisitor.

It's lovely to meet you and I can't wait to get this party started. Do you mind if I add you on plurk?

[shitloaf]

enter carver being like I'm not telling you about my life, weirdo. this should be interesting. baby brother is now older brother. all must obey X(!!!! or something. I'm just so waiting for this disaster.

and nope! feel free!!

[bloodmagics]

wow??? Just wait until he pulls out Bethany's neckscarf.... thing because I was cruel and gave it to him for Christmas. You're getting hugged either way though sorry bro.

Sweet, I'm agebinium as a heads up!

[shitloaf]

HAHAHAHAH gross. affection ):< he didn't ask for that.

also that is terribly cruel. carver might cry if he sees it.

[heroica]

and the number of wardens in wonderland grows. rubs hands together

HEY THERE, and welcome to eway! my name's kai and i play The Warden™, aka robyn cousland who is far and away used to people not knowing who she is at this point.

i also play sam winchester from supernatural, snow white from the comic series fables, and ellie from the last of us! annddddd i'm gonna add you on plurk, if that's cool, so if you get a friend request from a "kairaptor," it me.

can't wait to play with carver! /o

[shitloaf]

wardens > everyone else

man. I haven't seen a fables character around in ages. but yes!!! this should be interesting since the warden is totes dead in carver's world and, y'know, an elf. I just imagine he'll think everyone is a big fat liar basically. I'm so sorry.

[ivehadbetter]

*slams into this*

Hi! Welcome to eway! I'm Courtney, I play Isabela and Billy Kaplan from Young Avengers. But omg Isabela comes from a world state where Carver dies and Bethany lives so she's going to be so confused. It's going to be wonderful!

I'm breila24 on plurk. Will be adding you shortly!

[shitloaf]

billyyyyy. my fave young avenger (after Tommy shhh).

this should be great tbh. he'll be really happy she's like alive and stuff that it won't matter much that she has no idea who he even is.

[actualwizard]

Tommy is great. I wish we got more of him. (Forever sad about lack of Tommy)

Haha. She'll shrug it off real quick and then proceed to hit on him, because that's her default. Also because it will make Hawke's brain explode and she enjoys that too.

[shitloaf]

SAME. i have ranted about that many times. IT'S UNFAIR. i'll never forgive the whole ~noh-varr fills the white hair slot~ so we don't need tommy and we're gonna write him out bs. SCREW U GUYS, HE'S AN ORIGINAL MEMBER. but anyway.

that's good. same ol isabela. he'll definitely welcome it.

[magisterium]

HELLO and welcome to Eway! I'm Christine, and I have Dorian here (among others)! Super excited to see Carver, I know our Hawke has been wanting one for ages. Dorian has heard a bit about both younger Hawke siblings from Hawke himself, so he will be looking forward to meeting him ingame! <3 I am necrofancy and will be adding you asap!

[shitloaf]

I foresee them not getting along well but carver doesn't get along with many. especially poncy mages from Tevinter!!!! so. apologies as well ):

[magisterium]

I foresee this as well and regardless it will be delightful >.>

[morework]

a grey warden this is terrible the templar order has lost a great and mighty prick on this day. cullen will weep, i tell you, WEEP. by which i mean angle his lineface maybe 2.8 degrees to the left. so that said, HI. I'm Mouette, I play the resident Commander Noodleford (somewhere from the earlier half of Inquisition) and some telepathic physicist alien guy called Philip (radiopalkiller). very much looking forward 2 threading with you, hope you'll have a blast in eway!

[shitloaf]

moment of silence, pls.

but yes hi! looking forward to threading with you too and subjecting cullen to carver's old man yelling at clouds.

[fatherlesskind]

YES! More Wardens!

Hi, I'm Kaiya and I have just this idiot who is from pre-Landsmeet and will have no idea who Carver is. But he's another Warden so that means he must totally be OK.

And I hope you don't mind me adding you on plurk?

[shitloaf]

it's going to throw him so hard because alistair is like The Warden for him. like how are you even the same person?!??! but yes yes yes feel free to add me!

[fatherlesskind]

Wow, who you are to expect him to be responsible? Carver can be in charge, right?

And added! I'm fetchquesting jsyk

[shitloaf]

he probably could be in charge. not that he wants to be, but he knows enough now that he could take some sort of leadership........... pr......obably.....

[sciencelizard]

Hello!!! My name is Alex, and I'm also a new player! I just got accepted as Alphys from Undertale, but I'm also a huge Dragon Age fan so I'm excited to see more DA peeps around uvu welcome!!!

[shitloaf]

hi alex! new player hi5 :D anyone who likes dragon age is a-ok in my book

[outofthebreach]

SHOWS UP LATE. I already spazzed at you on plurk but eeeee, I'm so excited you're here. Even though Brennan thought you were a Templar and not a Grey Warden, but he's getting used to being completely bewildered by different world states. Sorry about your sis? >.>

[shitloaf]

he'd have rather been a templar tbh ): life as a warden is not anything like he imagined. he'll try not to be so aggressive but. inquisitor X(

[outofthebreach]

For what it's worth, in his world your sister was one of the awesomest people he knows and she's perfectly fine, so >.>

[nascensibility]

Hello, Amanda!

I'm Alex, and welcome to eway! I've been in this game for like...waaayyy too long and played a huge swathe of different characters, but the only one I have at present is Evelyn O'Connell from The Mummy Returns.

Excited to play with you, and I'll add you on Plurk - mine is uncalendula!

[shitloaf]

hello alex! you've just reminded me i wanted to ...actually sit down and watch the mummy movies. (one million years behind in everything). but yes, looking forward to playing with you :D

[nascensibility]

what are you doing w/ ur life u should be watching these movies RIGHT THE HECK NOW

[shitloaf]

clearly i'm not doing anything right ):